An interlude: tonight, the moon gave me permission
Untitled
Freyia Lilian
Tonight, the moon gave me permission to find my own particular animal.
I am meant for long sleeping, waking late in the morning and slowly emerging from my bed like a butterfly from a cocoon. I am meant for unfurling my body from layers of many-textured blankets, for drinking my coffee in my own time, decaffeinated.
I am meant for listening carefully to other people in other timezones at other points in spacetime describe their well considered reflections on life and gathered knowledge as I brush my teeth and take care of my skin.
I am meant to let down my hair from a silk scarf I spent time carefully selecting from a second hand website. I am meant to untangle it with my fingertips as women did in past centuries as not to break the ends and curb its growth.
I am meant to moisturise my skin with creams I made myself based on listening to it speak and learning about how to care for its particularities. I am meant to dress my body in muted colours, in soft fabrics, to wrap it up in knitted wools. I am meant to open my windows wide on cold days to recognise the edges of my physicality. I am meant for northern climates, for evergreen forests with ancient trees that belittle me, softly. I am meant for proximity to water.
I am meant for long days spent thinking and doing and connecting and creating and contemplating. I am meant for afternoon productivity. I am meant for late dining followed by night walks and dancing under the light of the moon, even if alone. I am meant for firesides, and skin-hungry. I am meant for solitary creativity in silence, for surfacing on occasion to share and question and listen. I am meant to fall asleep in the early hours of the morning.
I am meant for days longer than that on earth and rest longer than that prescribed by men in white coats or ivory towers.
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If you are concerned about your mental health, Folie À Deux always recommends turning to trusted members of your community first.
In the words of Drs Amelia and Emily Nagoski:
“The cure for burnout isn’t self care, it’s all of us caring for each other.”
Access allowing, spending your time and resources finding a supportive professional you gel with can be invaluable to your journey.
If you are in crisis and you don’t know where to turn, Strong 365 hosts their own free 24 hour peer led online mental health chat which can be found here:
https://www.7cups.com/p/strong365/?wla=strong365
A thorough list of mental health helplines for a range of countries can be found here:
https://www.helpguide.org/find-help.htm
The world is better with you in it.
